#78 – What Do You Really Want?

I’m reading this book in Danish called “What do you really want?” (Hvad vil du virkelig?) It’s a self help book written by Sofia Manning & Mie Kaas (two Danish life coaches) on how to make your life’s dream a reality and get the life you really want.

It’s quite interesting, really. I’m not reading it because I’m trying to figure out what I really want to do with my life…I think, I already know and am already doing it. I’m just reading it because…well, because sometimes it’s good to read stuff just for the sake of inspiration.

In the book (as far as I’ve read, at least), the authors talk about the importance of going after what you really want – chasing your dream and making it come true. A lot of people live unhappy and unfulfilled lives, because they’re stuck in a 9-5 job that they don’t really want to do. The dream is always there (in their hearts), but they’re afraid to go for it or they just don’t know how. Their job, family, friends, kids, bills, responsibilities, etc., prevent them from packing up their bags, taking the leap of faith and doing what they really want to do.

Like the young woman that I met yesterday who apparently had a good job, but really wanted to open a dive shop in Bonaire.

I get it. Chasing your dream is hard …it’s hard work. And sometimes, it just doesn’t work out. Dreams are great. Dreams are important, but in my opinion you also have to be super realistic. You can’t keep chasing your dream, if it never gives you anything in return and if it practically kills you along the way.

I believe that life is a marathon (not a sprint) and that you need to be in it for the long run. But how long should you chase your dream before realizing that it’s just not going to happen?

I don’t know. You should keep chasing your dream for as long as it takes or for as long as you can, I guess. You’ll know in your heart when it’s time to give up, change the dream or go after a new one.

But you have to WORK for it and realize that your dream will never come true if you don’t work for it. Dreams don’t just magically come true. So, if you’re a few years down the road already and nothing has happened yet, because you didn’t do the work…then don’t be upset. Or, rather, DO be upset…but only with yourself.

There’s a quote that says:

Don’t be upset by the results you didn’t get

with the work you didn’t do.

Chasing your dream is one thing, and it’s all super fine. But you need to throw in a bit of economic realism into the equation too. You can’t spend your time, hoping and dreaming without making a living. So, unless you come from a wealthy family who supports you or you’re married to a rich man/woman, you need to get a job. You need to get a job that you’ll probably loathe so that you can pay your rent, buy food, etc., WHILE you work like a maniac on the side to make your dream(s) come true. Will it be tough? Yes. Will you be tired? Yes. Will it suck? Probably.

Realizing, though, that if you live and grew up in the western/developed world, you’re so much better off than most. You have so many more opportunities because of the level of education you’re able to get, because of where you are, because of the internet, etc., so you owe it to yourself and the world to make the most of it.

But, hopefully, it’ll all be worth it in the end. Hopefully, you’ll be able to look back on this time with a sense of pride because you worked your ass off to get to where you are. You’ll be proud because everything that you do and have is because of YOU, what you did and sacrificed to get there.

And that will make the dream taste so much sweeter when it does come true. Eventually.

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